In a historic move, Parliament has shifted to permanent “Work From Home” mode after realizing that debates sound the same whether people are present or not.

Sources say most MPs keep their cameras off “due to poor network,” while actually attending weddings, inaugurations, and their third breakfast.

The Speaker now spends 80% of the session saying:
“Honourable member, you are on mute.”
The remaining 20%:
“Actually, please stay on mute.”

A pilot project is underway to replace debates entirely with forwarded WhatsApp messages.